Happy New Year!

Happy New Year! From the most awesome English Bulldog ever....my "little" Rocko!

I hope everyone had a great and safe Christmas and New Year's Eve/New Year's Day. Our holiday week was extremely busy but also a lot of fun and filled with friends and family. I really couldn't have asked for anything more. One of the highlights of the week was meeting my little niece Cadence for the very first time! She was born in April but since she lives in Florida we haven't gotten to see her yet. I absolutely fell in love with this little doll baby. I can't believe she lives so far away! I see some Florida trips in the near future!

This being my first holiday season sober, I didn't know what to expect. I am extremely fortunate that even with all of the family gatherings that I attended, I never once had to be around alcohol. I know this isn't the case for everyone so I am thankful for that. The living "one day at a time" certainly contributed to my stress level being much lower this year than in year's past. I knew I had a ton of stuff going on but I just didn't let myself get overwhelmed and worried about it like I have before. That doesn't mean I wasn't rushing around cleaning and cooking like a mad woman...that will probably never change. But it was a different feeling altogether and it was great!

I was so busy for a few days that I let myself get a little complacent about getting to meetings as often as I normally do. I went I believe 5 days without which is very unusual for me. I realize that I am not at a point where I can do that. I start getting way too irritible and discontent. I attempted to go to one on Monday night but as I was in the drive thru at Starbucks right before, I received a phone call that my family was on the way to the ER because Rocko and Will were playing rough like they usually do and this time Rocko's claw ended up on Will's lip. It ended up not even needing stitiches thank goodness but it was still a pretty good scare. Needless to say I didn't end up making my meeting that night. The next day I said come hell or high water I was getting to a meeting or I was going to commit homocide. HA! Lucky for everyone in my house I made it to one. And what a relief. Such a feeling of peace and contentment came over me. Amazing.

For New Year's Eve we didn't have any big plans. In fact we planned on just staying home. We usually travel on New Year's but we didn't this year. Certainly we weren't going to attend any big parties going on. I thought that I was okay with staying home. But as the afternoon progressed I started feeling kind of sorry for myself. Like, woe is me. I have to sit at home while everyone else goes out and does fun things. This is going to be just like any other night at home, nothing special. And don't get me wrong, I love nights at home. But I started to get in the self pity mode which is not a good place to be in. I knew there was a big New Year's event going on in the recovery community but I hadn't planned on going. Why not, I don't know. I started tossing the idea around of going. I started thinking it would be good for me to go and be around other people in recovery. So I discussed it with Tommy and we decided we would go out to eat and then to the recovery event. I picked myself up out of the funk, put on a sequined hot pink shirt and glittery eye shadow, and off we went. I was in a better mood even before we left the house because I started telling myself how silly I was being. Who says that just because I'm sober I have to sit at home in sweats on New Year's Eve. NO ONE that's who. Thank goodness my husband was willing to just get up and go out with me since that wasn't our original plan.

Most restaurants were extremely busy as to be expected but there was this new Japanese restaurant that wasn't too busy. We decided to try it out and when we walked in so did two of my longtime friends with their kids! We were doing hibachi so we ended up all sitting together and it was really a great time. I got to spend time with my husband, catch up with some old friends, and eat great food. After dinner Tommy and I killed some time shopping then we went to the recovery event downtown. I was SO glad that I decided to go. I was blessed with hearing a great speaker tell his story and spend some time with some friends I have made over the past year in this awesome sober community that we have. I told my sponsor I had been in a funk that afternoon and she said something that was very true: "Just remember, it's just another day." Very true. Yes, it was New Year's Eve but it was also just another day. Another day to celebrate sobriety, all the blessings in my life, and to spend an evening with good friends who genuinely care about me. Hubby and I came home after the event and relaxed and watched the NYE shows. We made it until midnight...barely!

So here's to 2011 being over and starting a brand new chapter in 2012. 2011 has been the best and worst year of my life. I like to think that the year didn't truly start until around mid May of 2011 because that is when I truly began becoming sober and that is when my life truly began in my eyes. I am so thankful for everything that I have today and hope to continue the sober trend into 2012 and beyond!